When we say “goon,” what do you think of? If you’re a fan of Canadian sports comedies, maybe it’s the 2011 Jay Baruchel movie. Comic fans might think of Eric Powell’s long-running series. If you’re British, then you’ve got a whole different set of associations. But in the online lexicon, gooning has a very different meaning. What exactly is gooning, and what does it mean to the TikTok generation?
We’re here to answer the hard questions, even if they’re gross. Fair warning, though: things are going to get a little explicit.
What is Gooning?
Let’s just rip the band-aid right off. “Gooning” is a term for marathon pornography consumption and self-pleasuring. The concept has been around since at least the early 2010s but exploded into the mainstream over the last few years. According to an Urban Dictionary entry from 2012, the goal of gooning is to achieve a trance-like state through continuous self-stimulation.
Gooning is thus related to the term edging, the sex act of deliberately forestalling orgasm. However, it’s different in that gooning is exclusively a solo act, is tied to the usage of pornography, and has its own complex mythology.
A critical element of that mythology is the eroticizing of one’s own supposed worthlessness and pornography addiction. There’s a whole gooner subculture, with gooning enthusiasts discussing and comparing their gooning habits.
That’s the literal, as-close-to-textbook definition of gooning as you’re going to get. But like any popular slang, gooning has rapidly expanded its semantic territory. For instance, you might hear someone call a piece of media “goonbait,” meaning that they think it’s trying to draw audiences in with sex.
Even “gooning” has become a little more diffuse as a term. Some argue that it’s completely distinct from edging and can involve climaxing if the gooner starts back up again. Others insist that gooning by definition involves an effort to avoid reaching climax. In this understanding, all gooning is edging but not all edging is gooning.
What is a Goon Cave?
A “goon cave” is the natural environment of the gooner. Here, he can masturbate in privacy, typically viewing pornography on several monitors simultaneously. A “gooner” is, obviously, one who goons. But again, the term has expanded beyond being merely a self-descriptive one applied by gooning devotees.
“Gooner” has become a kind of insult akin to “loser,” but a little more pointed. It’s an insult that only makes sense in a world full of adult content.
Why is it Called “Gooning?”
Like a lot of slang, it’s not entirely clear where the term “gooning” came from. That said, it might surprise you to learn that the term “goon,” as in a dim-witted thug or henchman, actually comes from the comic strip Popeye.
In this capacity, “goon” is a reference to a character Alice the Goon, who hails from an island of identical creatures called Goons. That’s right: Popeye invented calling someone a goon, just like Superman popularized the term “brainiac,” after a villain with the same name.
There’s another usage of the term “goon,” in which it means “fool.” This use of “goon” derives from the now-obsolete English word “gony,” meaning a simpleton. Gooning is about a single-minded focus on the task at — ahem — hand. So the contemporary usage of the term makes sense from both of these definitional perspectives.
“Gooner” and The Evolution of a Phrase
24/7 access to free, uncensored, hardcore pornography is a pretty new development in human history. Before the explosion of streaming video, smart phones, and high-speed internet connections, online pornography was pretty limited.
Going back even further, porn was shot on DVDs or VHS tapes or else was limited to magazines. It was much rarer to stumble across. Just ask anyone over 40, and they probably have a story about the excitement of finding a ragged old porno mag in the woods as a kid.
Constant, easy access to porn via tube sites, then, was bound to have an effect on the generation that grew up with it. Consider the arguments about Zoomers disliking sex scenes in movies.
Whether or not that’s true is an empirical question about demographics. But it’s not hard to see how a generation that grew up swamped in porn might feel a little uncomfortable with sexuality.
In that context, calling someone a “gooner” as a slam or deriding a game or anime series as “gooner bait” makes perfect sense. It’s an insult born out of a culture that’s been saturated in pornography and has ambivalent feelings toward it. Calling someone a gooner is essentially calling them a porn addict, similar to the term “coomer.”
While TikTok won’t let you search for the exact term “gooner” or even “goon” there are popular workarounds. Just type “gooo” into the TikTok search bar to see a number of alternative spellings pop up. It’s usually just a matter of adding o’s. However, even with the term banned, you can find TikTok’s for “gooner” using Google.
Gooning and the Sticky World of Online Discourse
Of course, this is a complex issue. On the one hand, there’s plenty of legitimate criticism to be made of the ways in which women’s bodies are presented in media. On the other hand, some people who throw around terms like “gooner” and “coomer” believe in bizarre, antisemitic conspiracy theories about pornography.
The term “gooning” has also popped up extensively in recent culture war conflicts over video games. Over the past couple of years, several right-wing commentators have become focused on the appearance of female characters in games. They’ve used terms like “woke chin” and “DEI chin” to refer to characters seen as insufficiently feminine or attractive.
In response, critics have used the term “gooner” to mock gamers who seem more invested in the sexual appeal of female characters than in any other aspect of the experience. What was once a simple, highly specified form of perversion has now entered the cultural lexicon as a synonym for perverted dork.
Are There Female Gooners?
For the most part, gooning is a male phenomenon. There will always be exceptions, and there are undoubtedly proud female gooners out there if you look. But gooning is, by and large, a male pursuit, and accusations of goonerhood are typically leveled at men.
Some have attempted to label women who consume large amounts of romantic fantasy fiction as “female gooners.” That said, this usage is much less common.
The British Exception
There’s one big caveat to all of this so far: the term “gooner” means something completely different in the UK. Headlines like “Rihanna’s a Gooner” don’t mean, well, that. In the UK, “gooner” is actually a term for a supporter of the Arsenal football club.
The term derives from the team’s nickname, “the gunners.” Of course, as social media has made slang more international than ever, both uses occur in the UK. That might put Arsenal FC fans in a bit of a strange place, but don’t expect them to give up the name anytime soon.
Be Careful How You Use (or Search) The Term
Like any piece of odd internet linguistics or ephemera, be careful when you use the term gooner. Be even more cautious when or where you search it. While plenty of funny content can be found, the roots are still unsafe for work.
More importantly, there’s a chance you may find yourself unwittingly drawn into a culture war, even if it’s just one about football.
